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Re: I'm retiring from competition


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Posted by StumpBaby on July 31, 2013 at 21:39:50:

In Reply to: I'm retiring from competition posted by Ford on July 30, 2013 at 11:21:22:

Hey Ford. I ain't knowd you for nuttin. But I muss say that my health sucks jujubees thru a paper straw, won of them wones with mickey mouse onna fronta it two. Couldn't be a plastic won kood it? nope, so hare I am prolly the biggest man south of Cananada with circula paper cuts on his lips thhe size of texas..but ware wuz I..oh..yep...it sucks shuranuff. I hadda give up a lotta stuff what I like...so what do I do now.. i rite poums..

this won a wrote a while ago...

Betty ate the beans and the beans was loaded
Betty went to bed and the beans esploded
up with the covers and up with the sheets
its a fiftee yahd dash to the toilet seat

That made me laff until I stopt...an I forgot bout everything what my health wouldnt let me go off and do..and this may be the bess part..but i aint got no more paper burns on my lips neetha..i think maybe it on accounta i was laffin so hard my lips was flappin reellee fast like this..opin close opin close open close opin clos opin close...so i dun started makin more poums..

this won i wrote a long time ago...an maybe you evin scene it all-redy..I started out makin a poum about tater tots but earllee on a realized maybe i wasnt good rymin about tater tots so i changed it like almost in the middel..i think it still works tho..but i'll tell you what..nuttin and i say nuttin...absolutely nuttin made of paper coulda cut mine lips for like days afta writin this and readin it back..mine lips was going opin closed opin closed for a long long time..evin if i asay so mineself. I gess the point to my storee is this..whatever you do..don't worry bout what you can't do no more. fine youself sumthin what you can do..an when you do....grease your lips reel-lee reel-lee well and buy yourslef a lotta plastic straws for shore..oh and don't you be hangin out with folks what like jujubees..fo nuttin an no money..trust me...oh an ifn you becum a poeit..send us sum of them poums..so the rest of us what cant do what we dun before..evin if we have them plastic straws or them paper straws..with or without mickee mowse onnem..that's our problem, know what I meen...


Tater Tots...a fine poum by the stumpbaby..

A poet you is not
but still a good guy

though you love the tot
I love the letter i

take the o outta tot
put in the i from it

you can eat your tater rot
I'll have my tater tit

mistah tater head is gone
his tater tots had eyes

mowin missis taters lawn
spud done seen us guys

Now its three months later
her butt is growin roots

my thing it smells of tater
time for runnin boots

dont play with food my momma said
how'd she evah know

playin with miss ol tater head
would make her butt vines grow

couldn unnerstan till dusk
when we wus goin in beds

momma she done smelled of must
when she done kissed our heds

an as she walked away I seen
a tiny little bump

a peekin point of bright bright green
tater roots from her rump

think I'll give you back your i
and take me back my o

mornings check my standin guy
to see if vines did grow

this is just no way to live
worried bout my goober

just because my love to give
was given to a tuber

Ahh..the life of a Stump...


I Hope you fine as much peace as I did Ford..It dont matter that i cant do some things, ifn i can still write poums what keep my lips clean of cuts for nobody, and thats thhe dog-gonned truth..

StumpBaby




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